Ego Weekend

What is Ego? Ego means what we identify with. I AM the small self, my fears, my fat, my beauty, my body, my aches and pains, my mistakes, my anger, my pride, my issues, my vanity, my emotions, my wealth, my poverty, my failures, my successes, and so on. Identifying with the small self often manifests as feeling superior or inferior. When we refer to the ego as an obstacle that usually means that small self mode.

The ego can also identify with the higher Self. I AM. I am Consciousness. I am an instrument of God's peace. I am a vehicle of Divine energy. I am the Witness, Watcher, and Seer of all this. I am letting go and letting God. Identifying with the higher Self feels good, peaceful, and in the flow. In this state, we notice how everything is happening perfectly and we feel grateful.

Anyhow, today I was thinking about the connection between ego (small self) and discipline. I notice that on the days when I am practicing my disciplines, the small self ego has much less hold on me. And the opposite is also true on the days when my practices fall by the wayside.

For example, during the weekdays I practice my disciplines very easily. I watch my sugar intake, eat lightly, practice yoga every day, pray and meditate, adjust my thoughts and feelings as needed, and plan my days. These disciplines make me feel light, light-hearted, and somewhat enlightened. I am identifying with the higher Self lots of the time.

But I've noticed that on the weekends, those disciplines sometimes go out the window and often by Monday I'm achy, bloated, and ready to be hard on myself (ego - I am my mistakes). It is also a bit harder to get back into those disciplines after I've let them lapse for a while. Can anyone relate to this?

So, what is the solution? Do I need to be more like Gandhi who kept up his disciplines no matter where he was or what was happening around him? But then what about taking it a bit easy with my family on the weekends?

I think the solution is to add to my Yogic Diet strategic attraction plan:
- BE GRATEFUL - I am grateful that discipline now comes easy from Monday through Friday.
- BE THOUGHTFUL and PLAN - I spend time to plan for the weekends. I plan to eat a high protein breakfast on the weekends. I plan to do a mini yoga and meditation session each day on the weekends. I do them and I feel great. I plan to cook a nice dinner for my family on Sundays.
- BE POSITIVE - It is now easy for me to take better care of myself and my family on the weekends.

Having a plan is 90% of the solution. Let me practice this and I'll let you know how it goes. I think it's going to be a good weekend.

Body Image and Positive Thinking

When a room is dark, you can’t illuminate it by bringing in more darkness. You have to turn on the light. Love is the brightest light. Therefore, begin to look at your body with love rather than with a critical eye. See your perceived physical imperfections with love and compassion. See yourself as a child or a lover would see you...as perfect, pure, and beautiful. Treat your body with love, gentleness, and respect. Give your body pure food, fresh air, and exercise. Changing the way you look at and think about your body will work wonders for your self-esteem. As your self-approval and self-confidence grow, your beauty will increase as well. How can you expect others to love you and think you are beautiful if you don’t love yourself and treat yourself with kindness and respect?

Best selling self-help author Louise Hay says, “Everyone suffers from self-hatred and guilt. The bottom line for everyone is ‘I’m not good enough.’ It’s only a thought and a thought can be changed. We must be willing to begin to learn to love ourselves. Self-approval and self-acceptance in the now are the keys to positive changes.” (You Can Heal Your Life p9).

Exercise:
- Make a list of your negative self-talk about your body and all your body issues/dislikes/worries/fears/troubles/health concerns. You can start from the head to the toes, from the outside to the inside, or any way you choose.
- Once your list is finished, take a moment to forgive yourself for this kind of thinking. Next, release these thoughts in a ceremony...I prefer an imaginary fire ceremony.
- Now, you are ready to write new positive affirmations and this is how you will think about your body from now on. You can start your list with “I love and accept my body exactly as it is.” Repeat your new affirmations as a way to deeply nurture yourself.

Hi, Remember Yoga?

Let’s face it. Sometimes, it’s not easy to do the practices that uplift us. Whether it is prayer, treadmill, cleaning off our desk, practicing yoga, or sitting for meditation, making the effort can be tough at times. For me, when I’m on a roll, it is effortless to take care of my body, mind, and soul. It’s so easy, anyone could do it. Enlightenment is for the taking. Simple. See the Buddha did it and so can I.

However, when obstacles arise and I’m thrown off course for a bit, it can take days or weeks to get back to that place of feeling like a yoga rock star. Yet, even when I want to sit on my sofa, eat brownies, and forget all about yoga...it keeps coming back to me. Yoga keeps calling me. I see it on TV, in magazines, and on facebook! I can run, but I cannot hide.

For the last few days, I have been in that space of resistance. I did not want to even hear about spiritual practices. I was getting stuck in a funk. Then yoga tracked me down and came up innocently in a casual conversation. A man was telling me about his wife’s back pain. Bait. I could not resist. I said, “You know yoga is the only exercise that can heal the spine so quickly. I met a lady last summer that needed back surgery and after practicing yoga for 6 months, her doctor gave her the all clear. She was healed. What a miracle. I myself used to have back pain, but no more...” I went on and on. I convinced him and me too.

Being now so convinced, I had no choice but to go home and practice yoga. The post yoga endorphins coaxed me return to my evening meditation. And of course, I felt so fabulous the next day, I had to start my positive thinking practices back up as well. I was really inspired when I taught yoga. I found myself feeling like a yoga rock star again and could even blog about it. “YOGA works!!!!!” I’ll shout it from the rooftops.

Thank you, yoga for finding me again and again. I wish that I may always be easy to find.

About Us

Monique Toh first came to yoga in 1996. While teaching English in China, she met an Indian meditation master, received a powerful awakening, and began her spiritual journey. She moved back to Texas in 1997, married her soul mate, got an MA in teaching at Rice University, taught high school, and continued spiritual practices such as chanting, meditation, and selfless service.

After having two children, Monique knew that her own state of mind needed improvement in order to raise truly happy and confident children. She had the great fortune to begin working with positive thinking and Law of Attraction techniques such as “Strategic Attraction Planning™” developed by Perfect Customers, Inc. The attraction plan clarified her path to the ancient yoga teaching that “we create our own reality.” Impressed by the results of her happier family, her steadier state of mind, and her own improved confidence, Monique became a certified Strategic Attraction Planning Coach in 2006.

While living overseas, this time in Indonesia, Monique finished a Yoga Teacher Training program in the Sivananda yoga style. Having always struggled with her weight, she found the healthy vegetarian diet proposed by yoga, combined with regular yoga practice, to be an easier way to stay connected to her body, keep fit, and heal old food and body issues.

Monique has successfully taught yoga and coached clients, resulting in improved relationships, inspired career choices, and personal growth. In 2007, she taught the first Yogic Diet™ workshop. Everyone who participated in the workshop had major breakthroughs. They lost a significant amount of weight, gained confidence, and healed self-esteem and body issues. They created a long term plan for making healthy choices in their diet and lifestyle and found new passion. Monique knew she had found her calling.

With her background, qualifications, and 13 years of yoga experience, Monique feels blessed to be a yoga lifestyle coach. She is an inspiring healer and teacher. Her integrated approach to uplifting the body, mind, and spirit yields the best results, time and time again.

The Yogic Diet Program Elements

The elements of the Yogic Diet program that I offer are:
1. Yogic Diet
Enjoy energy, vitality, and strength as you incorporate a pure, wholesome, and naturally delicious yogic diet into your life. Tailor your diet to include more fresh and dried fruits and berries, pure fruit/vegetable juices, raw or lightly cooked vegetables, salads, grains, legumes, nuts, seeds, wholegrain breads, honey, fresh herbs, herbal teas, and dairy products such as milk and butter. You may also want to reduce animal products, alcohol, sugar, caffeine, processed and packaged foods, tobacco, white flour, and fried foods which can adversely affect your body and mind. In addition to improving what you eat, the Yogic Diet offers suggestions as to how to eat, when to eat, how much to eat, and so on.
2. Yoga and Exercise
Be Active and Energetic! Make a fitness plan that you can stick to doing the exercises you love. Include hatha yoga into your weekly regimen to:
- Build strength and flexibility
- Lengthen muscle tissue
- Tone internal organs
- Flush toxins out of gland and endocrine systems
- Aid the flow of prana [vital energy] in the body like acupuncture/deep tissue massage
- Deeply relax your body and mind
* Some of the side effects of yoga are great health, abundant energy, proper weight, stress and pain reduction, and lasting feelings of tranquility, peace, and unconditional love.
3. Law of Attraction
We get back what we give out. Our thoughts, feelings, and actions must be focused on what WE DO WANT in order to attract it into our lives. Through the 4 step Bee-ing Attraction Plan(TM), you make an integrated attraction plan for your body, mind, and soul to ensure that you attract health and fitness goals, happiness, abundance, contentment, improved relationships, and a deeper connection to Source into your life. Having a plan is 90% of the solution.
4. Positive Thinking
Take a positive approach in all areas of your life. Practical tools such as contemplation, self-inquiry, prayer, and signs of land will help you release thoughts, feelings, and old patterns that hold you back and keep you feeling stuck in worry, anger, regret, and fear. A disciplined mind leads to steady wisdom and happiness.
5. Spiritual Practice
Make a plan for your spiritual practices. Whether you want to make time for prayer, meditation, scriptural study, formal worship, devotional practice, chanting, service work, or charity, the Yogic Diet will help you go deeper into your own faith. According to the philosophy of yoga, as well as the world’s religious traditions, the purpose of life is to know God and to serve others. Experiment and discover which practices resonate with you the most and make them a part of your life.
6. Selfless Service
Selfless service is a cornerstone of yoga philosophy and of good leadership. Discover what makes you tick, what you came here to offer, and how you want to serve your world. Be inspired and passionate as you improve and touch the lives of others in big and small ways. The Yogic Diet program will help you set achievable goals for finding and offering your path of service.

How I Came to Yoga - Awake, Now What?

Now that I was having huge metaphysical experiences in meditation and even on city buses regularly, what was to be expected from me? Was I supposed to shave my head, give them all my money, and live in a forest? Was somebody going to try to tell me what to do in my life? In May of 1997, I went to one of my teacher’s ashrams in New York to find out a little bit more. Honestly, I was overwhelmed with the energy of the place. Everything and everyone sparkled with light. My heart overflowed with happiness and love. The people were kind and funny. The food was delicious and vegetarian. The teacher seemed to be everything that she should be. I felt like I had come home. At the same time, I was still concerned of what was expected of me in return.

Over the next several years, I came to understand that a truly enlightened being wants absolutely nothing from us. If we give over a few dollars in offering or scrub the floors for free, it is actually for our own benefit and ultimate freedom. It is like in any other sector of life, the more you give, the more you receive. For me, that does not translate into money, necessarily, though I do give a monthly offering. Mostly, it has been about slowly, slowly giving more of my heart, trust, and time to God. It has been about becoming a more giving person in general. It has been about giving me the space to do the inner work to free myself of issues that block my potential. It has been about making time for a few minutes of meditation.

So, the spirituality of the yoga tradition appeared in my life first. Apparently, it was what I needed the most. Over the next 13 years, the contemplation and philosophy aspects of yoga led me to clean up my mental house more deeply and even become a life coach. Then, two years ago I took a hatha yoga teacher training, and the magic of yoga took the 10-15lbs I had always carried around (plus some self-esteem issues) away from me. For me, yoga totally works. Like my brother says, if it works you’ve got to buy the t-shirt.

How I Came to Yoga - An Awakening

How did I come to yoga? In 1996, I was teaching English in Beijing, China and my friend loaned me two books by an monk, or swami, from a yoga tradition.

The swami said to sit in a quiet and pure place and repeat the mantra Om Namah Shivah which means I honor God within me. I made time each day to sit this way for a week. I would arrange a little puja table with a picture of the teacher that my friend had given me, a flower in a vase, and a candle. I lit the candle, bowed, and sat for meditation. One evening as I meditated, my breathe began to steady and deepen and my body relaxed. Suddenly something happened. With my eyes closed, I saw the swami's face clearly looking at me. I felt an energy strongly move in my spine and then I actually left my body through the top of my head. I was hovering somewhere above my body looking down on it.

But this kind of thing didn't normally happen to me. I'm not a new age flake. I kind of believe in astrology, my parents were hippies, and I once ran through a forest with no clothes on, but I had not “left my body.” But here it was happening plain as day and it wasn't spooky. It was unusual yet it felt natural. Then the thought occurred to me...what if I just died? Oh @#%*, am I actually dead? Somehow that one fearful thought brought me right back down into my body. Feeling relieved and disappointed at the same time, I opened my eyes. I was sure something big had just happened to me. Maybe it was the awakening called Shaktipat which the swami had spoken of in his book.

Shaktipat awakening is an inititation that is given from guru to student and has been handed down this way, so the yoga scriptures say, since the dawn of time. For yogis, the body is made of more than flesh and bones. The body is a place in which one can reunite with God. There is a dormant spiritual energy called kundalini at the base of the spine in the muladhara chakra. Once this dormant kundalini is awakened by an enlightened teacher, one can begin his or her spiritual journey and know God in this body, in this life.

Right after my body leaving experience, the phone rang and my neighbor asked me to meet him at a restaurant down the street. So, I walked down the street in Beijing, China with a new awareness that evening. I was overcome as I saw that everything and everyone seemed to be bathed in light. Chinese people smiled and laughed with their families. I could feel their happiness in my own heart and see light shining from their eyes. I felt connected to them. I felt connected to the trees as they swayed with the wind. My senses were heightened with a sweetness. I was drawn to see the light, the best, in everything and everyone. I had received Shaktipat. I still have it. And thanks to my teacher and my ongoing practice, the experience continues to grow and deepen.

The next morning I had a glimpse of how this Shaktipat awakening had affected my life. I was not a depressed person before this experience, but I did awaken each day with a slight feeling of heaviness and a touch of worry. It had been a normal feeling for me and I never thought much of it until it was gone. I noticed that I was now waking up feeling a sense of happiness every day. Though still riddled with life's ups and downs, there was a newfound sense of lightness and joy about living.

One day shortly after the awakening, I was on a bus in Beijing. Of course, I was stressed from: having to fight the old ladies as we all had to customarily squeeze into the bus door at the same time, the screetching bus attendent demanding “Mei peow (Buy Ticket!)" at me as if I was going to try to not pay, and then settling into the noisy, dirty, bumpy ride to my destination. Despite the stress, my breath began to deepen and the mantra “Om Namah Shivaya” welled up from within me. ONS rose up on my in breath and descended on my down breath. The mantra had powerfully seized me and I found myself again shifting back into seeing and feeling the lightness in everything again. Over the years, I've come to feel that enlightenment is that state of experiencing the light, the good, in everything. With practice, this state can grow.

Your Body is a Temple

Did you know that your body is not the real you? You are not your body. You are the witnessing consciousness peering out of it. When you hold your finger out and look at it, the one seeing the finger is the real you. Your body is actually the temple that houses the real you.

However, you have been entrusted with the upkeep of this temple. How can you take care of this temple, this sacred vessel? If the temple is broken, you can fix it. If it is too heavy, you can lighten it and lift the burden from your organs and joints. If it has low energy, you can raise it with diet, exercise, and positive thinking. If it is not radiant and beautiful, you can love it, nurture it, adorn it, and accept it. Yoga teaches us to nurture our bodies and minds while at the same time giving up identifications we have such as: I am this body, I am these emotions and thoughts, I am this or that baggage/tendency/issue. Then we can begin to live more freely as our true light-hearted selves.

Many people have a contentious relationship with their bodies. I try to remember a simple equation: discipline in my yoga practices + detachment from the outcome = Contentment. When I do yoga with the focus of forcing my body into a certain shape/size/fitness level, I end up unhappy. And if I am too detached and footloose with my practices and intellectualize "I am not this body, I am the witnessing consciousness, my body doesn't really matter so much," I also end up unhappy because I lose fitness and focus. I practice and teach that THE GOAL is to aim to keep up a high level of yogic discipline. For me, that's ultimately the most effective way to be the caretaker of this temple. Detached discipline also builds self-esteem and self-power.

How can you start taking care of your temple? Start with what you know. Swami Rama said, "You don't need to know a lot of things, but you definitely need to practice what you know." If you've practiced yoga before, you love walking, you know that too many carbs are hard on your system, or you see the connection between your caffeine intake and nervousness, then start a daily practice which incorporates this knowledge. You already know a lot about how to take care of your temple...now it's time to put together a plan of practices. In my Yogic Diet coaching, I help students put together a Bee-ing Attraction Plan(TM) to deepen their focus and practices so that they can find harmony with their bodies and minds and healing for their spirits. Let me know if you're interested in creating a Bee-ing Attraction Plan(TM) of your own!

Ahimsa - Love Yourself

Ahimsa is one of the Yamas and Niyamas of yoga philosophy which were laid out by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutras as essentially a set of restraints and observances to work with as a foundation for spiritual progress. These Yamas and Niyamas are lightly dubbed the "10 Commandments of Yoga." The first Yama is Ahimsa which literally means practicing non-violence or non-harming toward oneself and others. Don’t hurt yourself or others with thought, word, or deed.

Once I was at an ashram studying yoga and I learned about the concept of samskaras. Samskaras are old and limiting patterns and tendencies that are known in modern times as our “issues.” One goal of a yogi is to identify, heal, and release our samskaras or issues so that we can be happy, serve others, and walk our spiritual path. During that stay at the ashram, I asked a swami, “What are the root of our samskaras?” He had obviously thought about this one because he sagely replied, “The root of ALL samskaras is self-hatred.” Wow, so it is ultimately self-hatred that keeps us stuck with anxieties, fears, all negative relationship patterns, self-destructive tendencies like overeating or drinking too much, self-esteem fluctuations, anger, sadness, and feelings of loneliness and disconnection from Source. But I thought it was their fault!

If it's true that all of our issues arise from a level of self-hatred, then the practices of loving ourselves and non-harming or Ahimsa are the logical solutions as the avenue of healing. This is why the Yogic Diet emphasizes nurturing and healing our bodies, minds, and souls. Each practice of the Yogic Diet, including nurturing the body with a pure diet and hatha yoga and mastering positive thinking techniques, are practices of Ahimsa.

What can I do today to practice Ahimsa? Start with making yourself a priority. Set aside some time each day to nurture yourself. Cook nice food, get your body moving, start to change your self-talk (no matter what the issue is) from negative to positive, and begin to see every obstacle as an opportunity for you to deepen your love for yourself. After all, God created you and is pleased with how you are manifesting. Now, become pleased with yourself.

The Yogic Diet for Your Body

One of the classes I offer in my Yogic Diet coaching is "The Yogic Diet for Your Body." This class is about developing body, mind, and soul practices for weight loss, optimal health, and happiness. In my course, clients:

- Create a Bee-ing Attraction Plan(TM)
- Move toward eating a yogic diet as described by the ancient wisdom of yoga and contemporary sources
- Incorporate the practice of hatha yoga exercise into their lives, including steady breathing and relaxation techniques
- Discipline the mind through the practice of Positive Thinking: self-inquiry, contemplation, prayer, gratitude, signs, and affirmations
– Attract the perfect radiant body using the Yamas and Niyamas (5 Restraints and 5 Observances) of yoga philosophy to heal body and self-esteem issues and increase self-love.

Contact me if you would like more information about this class.

What is Yoga?

Many people who practice the Yogic Diet want to know what yoga really means. I've listed a few different ways of understanding yoga.

One definition from the Bhagavad-Gita is that yoga is the dissolution of our union with pain. Dissolution means: disintegration, termination, disrupting, breaking down. So the practices of yoga can work to end our union with physical, psychological, emotional, and/or spiritual pain.

Yoga means union. It comes from the Sanskrit word yug which means yoke. Yoga helps to yoke or connect the individual consciousness to the universal consciousness, or Source. However, yoga is not a religion. Instead it offers techniques (like the Yogic Diet) such as proper diet, exercise, relaxation, steady breathing, positive thinking, meditation, selfless service and so on that can take one more deeply into his or her own religion or spiritual path. Yoga is suitable for people of all faiths and for the secular as well.

Our true nature, our inner self, is like the sun – it is luminous, radiant, cheerful, bright, and full of happiness. Our minds are like the clouds that sometimes blocks the sun. We tend to focus on the clouds and forget that we are truly the sun. Sydney Solis of Storytime Yoga says, “The discipline of yoga can help us move the clouds out of the way, so we can again identify with the radiant self and all its possibilities.”

What to Eat

In the book Yoga, Mind and Body, Sivananda Yoga Vedanta says “The Yogic diet consists of sattvic [pure] foods that calm the mind and sharpen the intellect. These are pure, wholesome, and naturally delicious, without preservatives or artificial flavorings. They include fresh and dried fruits and berries, pure fruit juices, raw or lightly cooked vegetables, salads, grains, legumes, nuts, seeds, whole-grain breads, honey, fresh herbs, herbal teas, and dairy products such as milk and butter. A sattvic diet is easily digested and supplies maximum energy, increasing vitality, strength, and endurance. It will help eliminate fatigue, even for those who undertake strenuous and difficult work. Yogis believe that people’s food preferences reflect their level of mental purity and that these preferences alter as they develop spiritually.”

In general, I recommend a mostly vegetarian diet filled with phytonutrients for optimal health:
¼ plate – protein (best sources: yogurt, beans, seeds, nuts, tofu, cottage cheese, feta, milk)
¼ plate – whole grain (brown rice, rolled oats, barley, sprouted breads, and quinoa are good)
¼ plate – lightly cooked vegetables
¼ plate – raw vegetables, salad, and/or fruit

Reduce intake of:
- Animal Products
- Caffeine
- Alcohol
- Sugar
- All processed food
- White rice or white flour (whole grains are best)

Weight loss and maintenance depends upon how the food/drinks we consume raise our blood sugar levels. Some carbohydrates have a high glycemic index (GI) which raise blood sugar like: table sugar, white flour, alcohol, refined white rice and noodles. Whole grains like brown rice, beans, low sugar fruits like apples, high fiber cereals, and sweet potatoes have a lower GI which help to keep blood sugar stable. However, even when eating low GI carbs, we should surround the carbohydrates with protein, healthy fat, and fiber.

Too many high GI meals cause a carbohydrate addiction which causes us to crave and consume more and more sugar even if we feel otherwise full. This leads to weight gain, lethargy, and blood sugar problems such as diabetes and even high cholesterol.

One of my yoga teachers, Sivaram Scott Orton, said, "Most important is gaining awareness of how we’re affected by what comes into our bodies and making adjustments based on direct reason and experience.” Start to notice how the food and drinks you eat affect you and gradually make changes for improved health, greater energy, and peace of mind.

Yogi, Tear Down that House!

A long time ago in Japan, there was a seeker who went to an enlightened master. The master told him to build a house. He worked really hard on it for a long time and finally it was finished. Then the master told him to tear it down. He was crushed and confused, but he tore it down. Then the master told him to build the house again. He put his whole heart into it and made it much more beautiful than before. The master came to see the house and told him to tear it down again. This went on and on until the 10th house was built. When the master told him to tear it down, he refused and ran away to find a new master. After some time, the new master found out what had happened and sent him back to his old master. When he met his old master, he begged to know why he had done this to him...asking him to repeatedly build and destroy the houses. What had been the purpose? The master said, "You are the houses. If you would have torn down the 10th house, you would be free."

I can really relate to this story. Over the past 13 years of practicing yoga, I've been able to heal several major samskaras, which are those old patterns, tendencies, issues that limit us in life. My yoga practices help me to first become aware of what my tendencies are: such as negative patterns in relationships and old food/body and self-esteem issues. Then I have to start building the house. I have to put forth the self-effort to do my yoga practices. And there are always obstacles, life happens, I dismay at my attachment even though my understanding deepens, and then the practices or the learning arena changes. The house that I had built was gone and I have to start over again and again. Then, finally, one day I realize the problem that had bothered me for years is GONE. Self-effort in yoga attracts the Grace to free us of those old patterns.

The Yogic Diet is all about taking a positive approach to releasing those deeply embedded samskaras. The body, mind, and soul practices of the Yogic Diet increase one's awareness of those old patterns so that latent fear, anger, anxiety, lack of focus, difficult relationships, food/body addictions and ailments, and feelings of separation from Source can be healed. Practice the Yogic Diet to start building the way toward a life of freedom.

What is the Yogic Diet?

The Yogic Diet is a set of yogic practices aimed at nurturing the body, mind, and soul. These practices include: 1. Pure Yogic Diet - move towards eating a sattvic (pure) diet which is easily digested, promotes cheerfulness, and is based on whole grains, fruits, vegetables, legumes, nuts, and soy/dairy products, 2. Hatha Yoga Exercise – practice hatha yoga to purify and strengthen the body, attain perfect health, proper weight, abundant energy, deep relaxation, and lasting feelings of happiness, and 3. Positive Thinking – practice self-inquiry, law of attraction, prayer, gratitude, and contemplation of yoga philosophy to promote mastery in handling one’s emotions and foster a deeper connection to Source.