It all started so innocently. I had been studying about the amazing health benefits of coconut oil, coconut milk, and coconut meat. I had been using coconut oil to cook all my veggies and using the coconut milk as a base to soups and smoothies for several months. I even found a lady here in Sumatra who presses the coconut oil fresh from coconuts for me to buy! I had been noticing higher energy levels, less food cravings, and much smoother skin. It was all good. Then came the coconut ice cream.
I started making coconut milk ice cream for my kids as a healthier alternative to dairy ice cream. And they loved it. I made maple walnut, strawberry, orange cream, and the undeniable best (beast), chocolate. I was making a new batch everyday almost as a religious ritual. The problem is that I was eating it too.
I convinced myself that it was fine because it was coconut after all. It was just a bit of sugar. I became an after dinner dessert eater and sometimes an afternoon cream tea person. I also started craving artificially sweetened chewing gum to sweeten my mouth in the mornings and then the afternoons. My veggies and fruits were seeming a bit more boring than before. The sugar monster had crept in undetected and I was blissfully unaware.
The first crash came with my emotions. I started being short, impatient, and grumpy with my family. My husband inquired if it was "that time." No, it was not thank you. My face broke out with lovely little pimples. Then, the dreaded moment for many women...the jeans were much, much tighter. That just makes a person mad! And for me, it can make me feel a little panicked as those old body image patterns resurface.
Well, of course I cut out the ice cream and the gum cold turkey once I realized what was going on. But that is not the real miracle of the story. The miracle is where the yoga came in. After doing some yoga practices one morning, I had a powerful experience. These words arose within me so clearly as a prayer of gratitude, "Thank you God for this experience and for allowing me to learn more about myself and go deeper into the yogic diet." I felt a tangible, positive shift and my body softened. My mind relaxed.
Releasing fear and anger and embracing love for who I am and acceptance for how I may still struggle is the true gift of all of those yoga practices.
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